‘IT'S NOT fair. Why can’t I stuff my face with chocolate like everyone else? I just look at food and I feel the pounds going on!’

That was how I used to think. I’d struggled for years trying to diet, but I’d just go up and down on an exhausting emotional roller-coaster. Then I’d get fed up, cover up my flab, and say to myself ‘People don’t mind fat as long as you’re fun.’

But inside I knew I was a failure in keeping on track with food and exercise. And in December 2003, at 18st 6lb, I landed up in hospital - I couldn’t even walk across the ward without pain.

Of course I prayed! I had got into a self-hating mode. I’d look in the mirror and say, ‘It doesn’t matter how clever you are or how good at this or that, or even as a Christian, how good you are at trying to serve God, you are YUK! YUK! YUK! YUK!

Friends would say, ‘Never mind! We love you as you are,’ but I didn’t believe them. After all, I knew I found it hard to love myself. That takes you on a spiral downwards.

Kick Start from God

Anyway, in hospital I met a girl who had serious heart trouble and she asked me about my faith. Bottom line is, I said, that God made us and loves us. I prayed for her, and her monitor registered an immediate improvement! She was gob-smacked and I knew God was kick-starting me into action. I left hospital after three weeks with tablets and an appointment for an angiogram. Sunday 8 February was a red letter day.

During singing in church I felt movement in my chest and sensed God had healed me. On Tuesday 10th I had the angiogram and the results were that I have A GREAT HEART!! Wow. Thanks Jesus!

Get moving Lynn! This is what I felt God was telling me. I asked for prayer support, found a healthy, fit, young friend – Carolyn – to mentor me and we got cracking. By the way I was now 54. God knows it wasn’t easy. But I now wanted to live life to the max. So, it was time for a new regime – hardcore diet, exercise and daily encouragement. Carolyn didn’t know or care about my past failures but believed I could make it, step by step.

We went from walking to power walking to jogging around a lake in all weathers. I could hardly believe it. It was a time of constant change and willing for challenge no matter what I felt and as mum said, ‘to keep one foot in front of the other’. In just under a year I lost 6 stone and climbed Snowdon with some friends as a thank you to Jesus.

What have I proved?

1. It’s possible for our body, soul and spirit to work together in harmony and be healthy.

2. That it is love and kindness that frees us from the ugliness of failure and self-hate.

3. That God can change us, wants to, and desires above all to lead us more deeply into HIS love.